5-19-16
I have to write now. Walking outside in the sun and speaking a loud without writing. (That's why writing is important).
I was talking about white people in cartoons again. Watched the new epsisode of PowerPuff girls without the sound on. That's how you watch a cartoon nowadays. Sound off, look at the images.
There is no need to spot the implicit Whiteness in PPG. It's already obvious. PPG is the progenitor of all low-brow cartoons that would come after.
Cartoons that white people do watch: -Steven Univerese
-Star Vs. The Forces of Evil
-The Loud Family (The Proud family a bunch of fucking niggers)
-Phenius and Ferb -Adventure Time
I can't think much more, but these cartoons are implicitly white. Unlike PPG which was emplicitcity white. Cartoons have shift from the universal to the more obvious. Whites that make these cartoons refuse to take the wisdom that their own cartoons was made for their own people. That could cost them their job, thier characther, and their life. I would like to write something of each of these cartoons and write a book or something about it.
I think afterwards, I checked my phone online for college phone number. Need a refund. Has some kind of protestor with "equality" written on it. Turns out to be a Japanese. A "black nationalist" japanese. How in the world, can one be for "equality" and fight for nationalism? White people are deluded. Kochiyama is doing what she naturally does. Ethnonationalism for everybody.
Losing my mind right now. Just called the college office now. On hold. I can hold for 10 mins and punch with one finger. My mind wandering to one subject to another.
Well, I am kind of hungry this morning. I want an apple but there isn't any. Also want to know if I can send TXT. file to computer instead of PDF. I don't want to copy and paste the file into my blog. Other ways to get around.
I might need a loan from mom this morning. I need to buy the beach tickets for me and Alice. Always worried tickets will run out.
5-21-16
Always have been having bad dreams this week. Last night waas the first I dreamt of nothing. Every dream has been about school trama or some kind of fear speaking my mind. The place and situtation I am in is unfair.
Now the aniexty of finding an "internship" is setting in. Successful internships and jobs happen with "connections" and "networking." Like a mom or dad that hands down a job to their undeserving child. Things are exactly like the fedualist era. America is a place about whoring and less about destiny. We have failed the white ethno-state.
Collin did call me yesterday. Wanted to hang-out, probaley pick up the new True Steel pack. Yes, I am his chofer. He is 24 too and dosen't know how to drive a car. I mean, he is autistic. He fails to pick up social cues.
...And Nancy is a dick-girl. Great. I hugged and kissed her. Must mean I am a closet gay.
Found out about Patalliro fan clubs over Tumblr. I can't even find that through a Google search (almost like the darkweb to find Patalliro news). Jokingly, I will start a blog-spot called "Mineo Maya Fanclub." Not really, but I have proud enough to consider myself a Maya afficando. I wish there was translations or I knew Japanese.
Drake is coming over in about 10 minutes. I am bringing my sntheisizer over and play along over at Quigly's house. It's better than babysitting Collin.
Haven't wrote in two dayas. I guess that's natural, considering Saturday and Sundays are usual off days in a working week. However, I don't want to lose the habit of writing. I must always write! I swear! All the promsied hobbies in the past, where I look towards daily disciplene, all but fail in the end.
This time, I want to accomplish something. Even if it means writing about nonsense. Writing about anything is important. I jsut have to learn how to type faster, think faster, and catch thoughts were they come through the time. I am a reporter trying to tackle the life that I live. It's that simple. Most people can't do it. It's a shame.
My goal is to write 1,300 words a day without stop, until late August, where I have to go back to you-know-where. At least it's my last semester, hopefully (I'm begging). As I type grease will get on each key. Typical? Yes. How do writers deal with that? A clean cloth? A wiper?
Writing is obsolete. Computers and robots can do it for you. Also, there is audio recording devices. They say it's better to explain things in logical words than to speak aloud. I believe that. Where would math and science be? But for writing? No. It's becoming more obsolete per day. The Freewrite will luckily be about recording the mind with buttons. That's the difference. My fingers will get sore. ...maybe learn DVORAK or COLEMAK?
There he is. Honking outside.
***
Back. 9:20PM. Did some things.
I filmed two films at Quigly's house. One I filmed this morning dove outside, the other, the vest-wearing yorkie. Quigly's drum machine music is hypnotic. His friend went snoring asleep on the couch. I too was tired, 4:35-6:10. I just read. Read something about National Review on The Right Stuff.biz. I also found Uncuck The Right's video for Amren (Amren was today). Funny! Shocking. The Alternative Right in once video! Every single writer I have read and admire in my life. Amazing. As if, I am not the only one that stumbled across these writers. I was one of many. Had to watch Jared blow sax in the bathroom. Getting away from the machine drum sounds.
We departed at 6:20. Quigly unfortunatley never press the record button on the mixer. I did, however, for the trapt song. Kevin saw this. We didn't know if it was right to record over any the stuff that was on there. Oh well. Quigly said it was ok too. He his 2 mintues of a 4 hour jam session. He can publish the song on his own Soundcloud.
Drake drove me to the mall. The original idea was Burger King. No. We headed for the Mexican restaurant in the court. No, too expensive. There was also Ruby's Diner. No to that, too crowded. I decided on Five Guys at the food court. We went in.
Tons of black people. Not going to lie. There goes the neighborhood...
Five Guys burgers were 7.19 per piece. Nope. We wanted to walk to the upstairs foodcourt. We found some doo-wop style restrutn. "Stardust" I think it was. Cheeseburger fry and drink combo only $3.99. Attractive Chinese register. We both got our burgers and ate. Said some sily jokes about Dragon Quest 5 and "Stick Drama."
Headed out and too Fishbone Grill where the car is. Kevin wanted Ice Cream. Ok. I wanted Blue Bear smash. Blue ice cream with gummy bears in it. Good. Kevin had strawberry something. $13.50.
We couldn't find the car outside. We got lost in the rain for a bit. Rain on my ice cream, no! Got in car. Ate ice cream and joked about being sick. Making funny wining noises. Drove home.
I had a brain storm at Quigly's house. Unfortunately, no Freewrite. I did write some notes on the memo app on my phone. It was losing power by then. 5%.
I just took a Milatonin before bed. Will go to sleep soon. My mood was must more jilty at 4:35. Now, I am writing out of duty. Kind of strange. At least I'm writing, yes?
Boring. Ughh...
It's for my own good.
If I was possionate right now, expect me to write 1,400 words about philosphy or problems. That I can do. I just can't do that on demand. It's really about writing how I feel or my life. I can do that. Once again, for my own good.
...need office lamp for typewriter at night. Ceiling light is busted. Will do that tomorrow.
Fuck, today was Amren. Another regret I wish I could have overcame. How the heck am I suppose to get to Tennessee?
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