Thursday, December 29, 2016

Nightmare / Beach / The Bum


I want my room clean and my brown table empty before school starts August the 22. I thought about clothes. I really don't need it. I am not a fashio n person. I wish I can wear a suit and tie instead. I want to show off my dedicated, and discplene beauty. That sounds right. Something like the Japanese would have a mindframe like that. I can't even the recall the gay shit other kids wore. I am not a kid anymore so fuck'em. 

I hope the roll of the dice will supply me with a good enviorment this last semester. I always think like that before each semester. And the last too were really fucking shitty. I am going insane. I want these last two to be easy. I am strong. I will make my stand and fight off oppenents. Th is is what is needed in the buisness world. I think it's funny these insitutions make life as if it is this Greek philoshy game or fun social club where everyone is a gentlemen, when in fact it's quite the opposite, and barbarians and putting illusions of this sort agaisnt me and other young n ot-so-innocnet kdis. They fall for it. And they will either go in denial or deal with this nature some how. Most people try and exert thier persona lity into a game that's nothing like them. Thinking about my Netrunner gro up at Wegmans actully. A lot of buisness have to do with people psycology , manipulation, and explotiation. Buisness is advacne. It's not a goody-to o shoes game. My grandpa was right. Lie-cheat-steal-kill-rape when you ha ve the chance. I felt some guilt ain my academica career. No matter. I sh ould not feel guilt. Guilt makes me weak. Cheating is a moral thing to do in this competeive and hostile world. I am doing the right thing. Everyon e who plays the game gets fucked in the ass. 

I wrote 1200. Time to tune in to Jared Taylor before bed. Get in my five hours. Hope the interent is back on Saturday night! 




I had such nightmare last night. It was like, everything was bad happening in it, but, I got revenge the moment. I had to work (((phone company))) and deal with the fake money currency and the idiot people that think the job is rewa rding, but rather wasting their time. And then, there is supposedly this College, which turns into a baby school out in the middle of the forest . A strange collison between joining the track and feild team, my bad all -women english classes, cucked men, and the secuirty state and small clich e of worhtless, upper class teenagers. Also some racial problems with a ho stile black that didn't like me (I think it was Nadir but he is the least likely person to confront me). Also again, my tranny friend Joshie want's to ask out that bitch Emili (who the fuck spells their last na me with a fucking "I?" I might as well be "Joi." Trying to edgy and origi nal but still connected to the background.) So this dream conculdes really nicely while I am suffering from this amount of pain. 

I run out of class, the sports couch tries to stop me, I find an exit he c an't get me. I walk into my annoying girl English room. Only to yell all at them back. They ignore me of course. And then walked into my phone job fun-saturday quiz day. I said "all of you are stupid" and "you are only fighting for fake money and your lives and this meaningless. Wake up!"

did a dance everywhere to be my last great who-rah. And then seeing Emil i walking down the hallway, I could not ignore her, so I got my tran frie nd Joshie, (Josh, who had a crush on her in my dream. By the way, is a guy cross dressing as a girl and identifies as a lesbian. Makes no sense, I know. Degenerate) and pushed him in front of Emili to talk to her. Josh of course was too shy to confront and easily backed off. Emili looking confused and snobby dissed him and moved right along like a begger asking for money. I yelled back at her, "your a bitch!" She yelled back, "your a bitch ." I said, "I know." And there was a previous moment where my dumb philosp hy teacher was with this black kid trying to say I was some kind of insenstive racist. I told him all the reasons why you should not think like tha t and I won mostly. He had nothing to say but suck on his thumb. 

As a reward for all this clamity, there was a board game convention and video-game thing on at 4 till 11. I had to leave early to go to the dentist at 5, but in my dream, I was still determined to find Neo-Geo and games 


I never heard of. Then I woke up with a sore headache and still feelings ome sun on my since yesterday. 

The beach was fun yesterday. The only problem was, waiting on the bus fora few hours and laying on the beach with nothing to do but napping and thi nking about things. My brain was writing without a Freewrite. If I brough over my Freewrite to the beach or something, I would of been writing for the next 4 hours and getting those thoughts, like a lasso over a wild crea ture, and putting them down on canvas. I feel a little upset now I can't think about those things since yesterday. Most of the thoughts are long gone. I dod remember a few... If I can sum it up in a paragraph. 

I was napping on the beach. Getting squahsed, I had to streach my feet in the air and arms. I made a noise of a gurgaling yawn. I overheard a bit l ater, some guy and his jock friends behind them said "oh wow look at that guy strech his arms and makes noise, he's probley a perv of some sort or m asturbating, laying all by himself." They countinued on with other subject s in the same spot. 

Intresting. I was alone with myself, and will more likely get bombarded w ith insults. If I was with my brother or girlfriend, there would be no in sults. It's intresting to think the insult will only come if I exist alon e in public. As if, to counter this, I have to be a strong man, like John Wayne or the Doom4 guy. Most people have to flock togetehr in order to no t suffer from single barbarian order. And if I was do something that was agianst the norm of society, I would be publicy shunned for it. This is l ike the man in New York who passes a homeless white person and says, "Get a job you bum!" 

Now, this would not happen if the bum was non-white. 

I had a friend named Dosha, who is both Chinese and Jamican. Last year, sh emoved from Harcum to Drexel. Why she did this. She felt that the all white girls club was ignoring her or only taking in her points that satsfied the interest of the white girls that felt intitled. Meaning that, Harcum is full of upper-class white girls that are blissfully unaware of th eir surroundings, theroy, and self-nature. They pretend they are open-m,in ded and liberal, but in action, they ignore things that are non-white or o ppose to white-womendom. Open-mindfulness and liberalism is really just a charteristic of white people. And white women are not unique creatures oppose to men, they mimck the behavior of white men as women. So when men supppose to men, they mimck the behavior of white men as women. So when men b lame women for all problems, it should be realize is that it was men who are acting out theroy and white women only mimicking as a means of surivi al and relationship. Women are open-vessels and are programmed to be mtohe rs, not warriors. Women can bleive they are warriors if men say they are so. A Japanese woman once saidthat Japanese women are "that of a coruse mix between a human and a bird in a cage." So much wisdom there. -Jared Taylor said that.

Dosha moved is because white women, like Emili and her autistic, physco-socialist friends, shunned her because they are afraid to answer to non-whit e, women like themselfs. They are afraid to be called racist. Also becuas e they dont understnad the non-white perspective and rather defuse everyth ing as being egalatarian (another white person charatheristic). All nonwhites of the world realize that white women are cartooned as Cinderrella, a Victorian princess, or some kind of mannerism English god. This is the ch aretristics of white women. 

That's why the New York man is afraid to call out a non-white bum. He wil l be called a racist! He will lose his job! 


a new cat


He is playing Depeche Mode wihtout my will. No. It's t oo much and almost embarassing. I better watch what I tell Dave or he is going to mimick it. I wish he wouldn't do that. I feel like I underestim ate my power when I am near him. I don't want him to like everything I like. I jsut tell him about the things I like, and then he plays cop y cat. I feel bad sometimes, for the wrong actions I did, Like spit in hi s face or get mad at him, while he will drastically change the next time. 

I wish he wouldn't do that. I don't get attached to things he likes. But I am on to music, that is an influence in my family. So I stick w ith it. I don't listen to anything he plays. I learned funny jokes And popular commentary. Gangster Popeye and Mamin Baby. Good source of information. But I am not a replicat of all his moods. 

Selling my sexond Roland TB-3 and A Game of Thrones Cards. I need the mon ey to buy a hybrid microphone/interface to record vocals, sing, in Reason. 

Either I get Line 6 Sonic VX or Apogee One Mac. Apogee looks like the be tter canidate. I have to confirm that it works with Reason or any other Da w to record vocals. After I buy that, I can finally make the music I want 

to make. I am getting less and less interested in hardware and that is a good thing. 

In other news, No Colemak typing. Sorry colemak. I have been typing again I have invented my own typing style through QWERTY. I know I should lear n touch typing in the future. That would make sense. But so hard to go slo 

w while typing. I feel this way has a better curve to it (my original, lo oking ath the keys while my hand covers the right side of the keys and the 

left types the delicate words. My fingers are like spider legs touching little buttons). 


I am going to the beach tommorrow ALONE for the first time. My dad ppreach ed to me about bus stop pedophilia. What out for older pedos. I will be ok . I will not get obducted. This keyboard will keep the infomration in hea r that I DID NOT GET OBUCTED and it was aconicende if I did. Which I don' t want to get kidnnaped or die. The family will find out about my notes s oon enought. Enough dooming pesimissm. I will not die. I will enjoy myself 

tommorrow on the beach. Now, I have only 5 hours to go to sleep starting at 1. I am typing after midnight. 

while lifting weights, I thought about the Sammer Jam 10 thing I will be going to too. I hope I do see Kesly there and for that day. And I hope a normal ps4 pad will do. I am not buying a stick. I made up my mind. I don 't even have access to other people who play KOF on a daily basis. In fac t, do I even want to assciate with those kind of people? I have assiciate d with Netrunners and board gamers for some time. It was fun. Not my life though. I should ground myself back to music. I gave 6 years of my life to 

games. Maybe even 10, if I started at 15 with Doom the board game. Odd. 

Now I am playing Doom4 on ps4. Amazing. And the game is almost like Doom 3 all over again. Maybe I will grow out of Doom too. 

I have grown out of Doomtown too. The game ended when I stopped. 

(when I always press Special, I end up always at 600 words. 600 is so com mon for me. What I am really trying to aim for everyday is 1000-1200. Tha t is a good amount. Write that everyday for month, 30 days or so, and that 's 30,000 words! enought to fill a novel! Think of a single chapther as be ing 1000 words each. And make it 30-40 chapthers. That sounds like a good novel to me. This novel I am writing about is my personal summer. Trainin g too to think about it. Eventually, I will get into the mood and write a 

fictional prose or research/academica project. I will be doing papers al l over again in the fall. My last semester. So lets make it my Swan Song) . 

I need a bos to ship out that Thrones binder in. Book cubbies are find. I 

moved down those game boxes finally. I need to move that seagull and pict 

moved down those game boxes finally. I need to move that seagull and pict ure of the beach. Funny, I am going to the beach tommorrow. So no need for pictures. Also I need a new Chinese cat to get me through the fall semes ter. Two years ago it was Pink for love. I got Alice. Second it was for E 

ducation. This is my last semester. What should my next one be? Money? Bu isness? Fortune? I have to go to the mall and get a new cat. 


Monday, December 19, 2016

Lisa Shin fan


Life is really bad when there is no internet connected to the house. Absouley zero internet starting this Monday and the tech guy is suppose to solve the problem this Saturday. I am going to the beach by myself. I will sunscreen myself and maybe bring a chair. Will have the backpack on me all day. Hopefully will not get burnt. This will be my last gooday on the beach. Mom want's to go to Lancaster for Grandma's 87th birthday. Another full day. She's half dead now. And I am not so sure if she is alive. She made some wrong choices in her life and will countinue to do so. That is her faith. Nothing and worthless. 

Downloaded some more Reason rack extensions (luckly while the internet DID work around noon). Five canaidates: AS-16 Sequncer, Ivoks, ReDominator, Glitch, and Tick-tick. Selling my second TB-3 to get the money, maybe bfor an interface and a mic if the touch and sample thing dosen't work. I really need the internet back on so I can look up Youtube videos to know how to do it. 

And then there is Doom 4, which is finally donwloaded thanks to Drake's house. Verizon is better! Work taught me one thing, and that is Verizon is t he better deal. 

I was over Quigly's house tonight with Ryan. His friend is autistic and lazy. Red hair, glasses, weed smoker, DJ, music maker, real name Al. He did play some really intresting records... I chose by the way: 

Mr. Fingers - Can you feel it? Instu mix Frankie Knuckles - Baby wants to ride Neu!
Nina Hagen - Fearless 

Kraftwerk - Tour de France 

This records I am fimiliar. I forgot how much I love Nina Hagen. KMFDM era, alien like voice, Rebirth hyper industrial 1999. Technology goes by so fast. 

Watch a little bit of the Reublican National Convention at his house. Saw this cute Asian walk on stage. Lisa Shin. Korean-American, politicain for New Mexico. "I would date her." I said. TV went off. Black friend came in. Liked what I was watching. Said he is voting Clinton because Sanders said so. 

More Qiugly DJ night. 

Two cheeseburgers, fries, chicken and suace, four birthcake cookies (chips ahoy), chip sandwhich (cookie chip), black berries... water... 

I feel it coming. Clenching my butt so the poop won't fall out of my anus. I like the feeling as my two buttcheeks clench. It feels good. Good like Sonic & Knuckles for Sega Genesis. Very early memories. Things are memorized everyday at the age of 14. Ten years ago... wow. That's when life really started. But before 14... everything is a no styalgic blurr. Some memories hear and there. Idk. 

Getting upset at Banjo Kazooie. Just remembered. Now I can beat the whole game while listening to Depeche Mode Violator by the beach in three days. 


The poop was finally released from my anus. It slided into the toilet wat er. Looked at it, whiped my butt with toilet paper, and flushed it. Washe d hands. 

90% of people look at their own shit, after they taken a shit. - 

Glad I am back ony my typewriter. I am afraid to get back on it if I am g one from it. Strange. When I start typing, all those horros go away, and
I countinue from where I left off in thought. 


I want to sell my Game of THrone cards now. I grew out of it. I don't wan t to see the cards ever again. I am not longer in that state of mind. (I should move those game boxes in the basement too. Tired of looking at them 


). How can I remember, now it's almost been a year, since Glen was being a jerk too me? It left that much a mark on me, that card games, in genrea l, is a backwoods are worthless tradition that dosen't need me. I am too s trong and healthy for them I realize. I have moved on. That was the past. 

I sold my Doomtown cards. And now, AEG pulled the plug on it. I started m y own Doomtown club back in 2014 when I was 23. Ended when I was 24. No o ne came, jsut one guy. I did my best. Doomtown failed when I stopped play ing. Thrones will stopp too. Fantasy Flight just got everyone that played first edition thrones onto new edition. New eidtion was made beacuse of th e wild success of Thrones HBO series. It's that worhtless. No new players, 

no changes. Fantasy Flight dosen't spend money on advertisers and expects 

people to make blind buys and perverted devotions. Nerds. That's what the y all are. The scene is not growing, it's shrinking. Cards grow, but peopl e stay and find their niche. Fantasy flight is offering too many games wi th too many niches. It won't do. It's simply a fashion statement. Everythi ng is now like Legend of the five rings. A cult card game with a niche ad ueince, but totally not like Magic. So boring and useless. Weak people. 

I think I have reached a sweetspot with cards existing in Netrunner. I th ink I like... Let me do the math. 112 Core, 120x5=600, 220 Expansion. 332 ... 932 cards? 900 cards? Is that the sweetspot pool? I like doing math. S o let me see now. 

Lets say Core offers 120 original cards. And then expansions are 55 origin al cards too. So if the game were to get rid of cycles and offer just 55 card expansions. That would be. 50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50-50. 

15 expansions? Three a year? 5 years or sooner? 750+120=880/ Sounds about right as the sweetspot. Stop the game after the 15th expansions. Cheap and 

affordable card game. aboout 400-500 dollars. This is the future of coll ectible card games. Amazing. I would like to take of this design and star t my own CCG. I should examine all the other CCGS offered too and compare them with this slaes design. Examine, compare and contrast, card pools and 

avialbility. Most CCGs were made for money. I am making them out of util ity and design. 

See there? I go talking about board and card games because I love them so much. I don;'t think the normal world understand my love for card games. T he board game scene will never understand. . 


...Time to charge this guy. 

Good Asian Porn

Awesome porn I saw today with this beautiful Chinese girl sucking off a nice white dude. She was A-cup, like most Chinese. The video title was som ething like "she learns to suck white cock." The room was fancy. A bunch o f punk posters on the wall and flyers. I saw the band "Doom" which my brother likes. So this guy is somewhat of an edgy and physically fit. How did he get a nice chinese girl? I don't know. At the end, she spited out this long white line of sperm from her mouth. A giggle. Extremly cute. Sperm on someones body is like children hugging her skin. A way that, that the white guy's genes and family runs on her body. She allows it. She is one with him. She respects the family. At the same time however, I ponder her existence with him. Does she know his white boyfriend likes Doom and other punk bands? What does she think about it? Is it macho for him? A way for him to really be a man? Is he responsbile? Or is he decadent and depraved? 

I am not sure. But other white americans try and emulate like him. - 

A thought came to my mind. A poor liberal white trying to be gay and emulating to be a jew. Great. That is someone mental illness right there. Wha t does that make me? I have to be strong and fight this force in the future.

Also, got this nice poloroid box today for my Freewrite. It fits perfectly. Althought, I should really only use it when I travel with the freewrite. It's not a good dust protector. I will find it really annoying once I over and over again put the Freewrite in and out of the box to use it. I should only use the box IF I am bringing the Freewrite somewhere. Which most likely, Am not. I will put it in the closet until I have use for it to bring the Freewrite somewhere to write. Yes. 

So annoying. I really wanted to play Doom 4 today. But ended up being annoyed it was not loaded and could not fully played it. What a tease. I got to play level three tonight. Still not satifsfying. I never knew downloads would be this harsh with PS4. I pretended to be lazy today so I could w ait for Doom 4 to download. I watch some Top5 videos on abandon islands, f orbidden places, underwater creates and sounds, and underwate caves. Cool stuff. I like sea creatures. I love the water the most. Exotic and cool. Cave Fishes are cool. 

Tried to learn some Reason today, but mainline pennsylvania Reason employer told me advance editing and mixing technigues instead, not operations. He said use Blocks instead of Redrum and Kong, and if you use Redrum, layer it, put the sounds to differt channels, and put some EQ compression on t he sounds to make it feel slow attack and "punchy." I really don't get it. 

He's manipulating Reason like a card game player messes up a deck in a CCG. Totally too much innovation and less about operation. I just want to l earn the thing and know whats what and whos who. Annoying. 

Interent still acting slow. I should go downstairs and see if downloads can work while the PS4 is in rest mode. 

(I been typing the word "just" too much. Sounds so instant and quick. Tryin g to ignore, but it comes back). 


Donald Trump was on tonight. He came out as a silloutte and surprised ever yone. "We are going to win, he said." Drake says, "Nigger rap, all star game." Almost like, "Nigger games." Which Trump is like. Nigger poltics. That suits him well. I missed his speech.  

Tried to text jack again but he never want's to hang out anymore. He is becoming more stupider. I think I have to let him be. He is really dying a lone. He just complains and worries. 


No title


The strucalist teneded to argue that there is NO innate meaning within the text. 

There is some wisdom to this. 

At my education at undergrad college, I have realized in these "survey" classes, they ask the students "what did you see in the text?" Total baby shit. 

This constant and daily musing made me realize that text: novels, books, newspapers, anything written in physical form, is an illusion. That, the text, is rather, a rulebook or guideline to a game. A rulebook or guidelines. 

The text is not meaningful. It does not take over out lifves. We take over it and create meaning from it. In return, we feel it has a sacred power over us. 

Books, call it, "third-party bibles" if you will. Wrong way to think abou t text. The text is a rulebook or guidelines. 

If I have really read the text, I would have taken things that meant some thing for me. And me only. There is no objective reality. 

The way I read Dune by Frank Herbert is differnt the way you have read it . 

Novels are rulebooks and guidelines. 

Readers "deconstruct" the text and take what they want to justify the perv ersions that they have. Again, text has no innate meaning. 

It is art on a wall. The text is. 

People have read the text wrong. Lilly, that dumb bitch in school read it wrong. They treat the text as good as the bible. A "third party bible." A facade and a perversion to make sense of their active and offensive personallity. They are reading themselfs. 

The world and the west, in all honestly, is primal and natural. But, the bourgeois classes and elites are in denial of this behvaior and wish to control it or alter it and maybe even add in some religion to it. They say race dosen't exist and sex is great. But really, race is real and sex is not that idyllic. People are primal and the working classes live by this truth. Eventually, the higher up classes are over thrown by the primal class. We are animals. That is our nature. 

Accordingly so, this illusion about reality exist over academia and modern life. We live in a Soma state. We belive our lifes are meaning through "pyscosocial" narratives, careers, and selfishnis. Everything around use m akes our life meaningful, but in return, are not so meaningful. Everything it a sales pitch, a paywall, a trick to decive our interest and culture. 

We are a consumer culture. 

The text has became "second person". It dosent matter. What matters is if the text matters to YOU. The text, according to academia, is as well rulebooks and guidelines. Professors surf the text to find sources and quotes and again, recite them in thier own written text laangue, to be published in another guidelin/rulebook to be yet again, cited. Professors treat the world of academia like that of a car salesman, a stock-person, a manager, and any other job creating and selling products. The text is the commidity which the use and create new text to sell back again. It is the product. 

To the student, the text is a rulebook and guideline to prepare them for the "as-if" job to become a sales manager. It's less about meaning. Often, the student will make the mistake that the text is a third-party bible, or a scared piece of text that has something to do with hierachy meaning of intellect cultuire and history. In reality, it is just text that is often used in the guidebook/rulebook circle. Again, the text is a guideline and rulebook to a game people want to play. 

Shakesperare? No differnt from the operation manual of your newly bought video game system. 

Plato? A grocery lsit to the food you need to buy. 

Any other victorian writer: your montly bill send it to pay for the house you got.

Why then, would these names would be sacred anyway? Because people read the text like that of sincericty, objective science, and of a sacred relgious bible. Names like Shakepseare and Plato, the ancient tradition of Western Civilization. The world is primal. This is why they are defended. However, wisdom and cheerful quotes are nothing more than text without meaning. Guidelines and rulebooks to play the academica professional and to defend one self in the wild. To play a game. 

There is no rules to the game of survivial and the primal world. There is however, relgious books. But non-relgious text, like Shakepsere and Plato are rulebooks and guidleines too. 

To have any interest in "meaningful" text, is a selfish facade. In the end, we are confirming words on a canvas that relate to our personality, confrim personal belifes and opinions, and worship false gods that help make our personalities. 

False gods, by the way, are like the poltergiest. Ghost. They don't exist . They never existed in our lifetime. Yet, the ghost exist, and the text haunts us. And we want to belive the holy ghost is with us. Tomology tends to belive the holy ghost is in ALL text. True. 

That is, when are we going to belive that Jesus, Shakespere, and Palto are not real? They were dreams that existed many years ago that don't exist in our own current space and time. In fact, do we even know if time existed years ago? Do we have time correct? Or is that a dream too? 

Literary figures are figments of our imagination. They are not real, even how hard we would like to belive they are real, we never walked by their side. 

We should walk and talk with the people in this room. And read the text t hat is being created now. Not a billion years ago. In the end, we only re cieve the wisdom from these ancient text. But once again, ancient text we re written by people who existed only 500 years ago. Everything is facade . Translators, editors, a tradionalist are not the original, authentic voice of the ancient old text-writer. 

Homework is a guideline and rulebook to greater and more primalnature to sruvive and be a leader a world runed by animals with adavance langauge and concepts. 

That is, Us. 

The text won't save you, it won't help you, it won't help current political situtaitons, reality dosent exist and is a figment of your imagiantion. 

It's the reason why liberalism, communism, and the new left in genral, failed to understand. 

Once this is understood, I think we can all be "red-pilled" and break from the matrix. 

After all, I am a student in a room with a bunch of spoiled brat girls who are reading things out of mental masturbation. Just compare and contrast this to anyone living in Allgengy, Philadelphia. 

Nothing is being learned. We are actors on a stage. We are trying to play a game we don't understand. But of course, the text is there to help us play the game. 

...If you are dexlysic, you are alreadiny ahead of the game. Because you can't read the text, you can only act out as a game player and only guess. Letters and words meaning nothing. Only things that make us happy. Communication helps conform us. Might as well lie the whole situation and pretend you read and quote. 


Work sucks



I can't believe that one autistic idiot working for his company is 24 years old, going to get married, has a "audio enginerring" "degree" (not bahceor' s or asscioaates) and was originally from California.


This is your life. And you chose to be a phone guy surfing west Philadelpiha? Your worse than Will Smith! And I bet this idiot does it for 57 hours too and likes it. 

That is your destiny. That is one destiny I would personally not accept. 

I like job shifting. That suits me the best. 

I will just have to go find another job that will use me. Number one thing about getting hired is... employment is for those who don't want to to do the job! Best kept secret. Employment never gaurentee it would be safe. I t's just open is because... NO ONE WANTS TO DO IT. Possibly the position is inhumane or even worse. 

Then, why the facade that work promise flowers, unicorns, girls and adeve nture? I guess that's the attraction and the lie. The only people who lov e thier job is those that suffered these previous positions and "worked" ( code for lie-cheat-steal-kill-rape) to the top and become America's 10% e lites. 

Really? Once you reach that top, making 90 to 100 thousand a year, we end up reverting back to being kids. teenagers. Is that why America is obsessed with youth? Freedom from the responsibities, the duties, the guilt of work? So idiotic but true. Why can't we like those things? 

The lady in the blue dress, I remember, (((that idiot))) told me IS the 5% of America! Intresting. What does she even do? 

Nothing. Being yourself. Elites push their lives on to the unfortunate one s that make their own lifves possible. Strange. Why does the working class suffer so much to make the dainty, innocnet elite class so... innocent? 

The elites want nothing more but a house, a pool, three kids, a dog and ca t, cars and an income, to pay for the perverted hobbies they like to do. B each this summer, vacation for the kid this fall, happy celelbration this christmas on our yaot boat this winter. 

Strange life. America helps enables this. I love America... but. 

The elite calsses eventually become beogeoius, depraved, and decadent. Wo rse. Their vaulves and spread on to others. They run the game. And the on ly way to compete with them is to fight back with money. America gives us the chance to be Gods. But their are many gods, and gods fight each other. In America, we are above the law of world, and eventually we are bored . 

We are miserable because we are free.