Saturday, May 28, 2016

Super Mario 64


Super Mario 64 is a strange game. I remeber the game when I was young. I think it was back in Christmas of 1996 or 7. Unlce Mike bought us a Nintendo 64. The game that came with it was Super Mario 64. I remember the day, Mom told Dad to install the N64 into the giant brown TV. It was in the basement. I was just staring at Dad as he played with the wires . The N64 was on. It was a matter of finding the right TV channel. Luckily, he pressed video, and the game was on the menu select screen. Obviously, Kevin must of press the start button the controller, passing the intro screen. I just remeber the TV screen pass to the side, and things were all around the place. All his chaos just to install an easy video game system. Mom probley told him to do it. We patch his pain. This probaley was after Christmas, somewhere in Janauary.

I don't have much memory Super Mario 64 after that moment. Just Don playing the game anyway. The next mememory would be in 1st grade. Maybe 1998. I was getting off the bus. I think Kevin was there, not sure. Colin and some other kid was there too. I was a cartoon characther back then. I really thought I was something like an animated comedian. I said "I have some good news and some bad news. Good news is, I know where the 7th star in Bomb-omb battlefield is. Bad news, It's guarded by a big black Chain Comp!" This would sound funny to 7 year old kid. I remember having a similar joke. "What do you call dinosaurs ontop of someone's head? Dino-head!" The pun was logical, not funny.

I remember trying to play the game when I was young. I remember being outside the castle, trying to move the controls. I remember we had three stars on level 1, 2 stars on the snow level, another three stars on Womp's fortress, and 1 star on the pirate ship level. Even getting enought stars, the basement was a challenge. One star in Hazy Maze Cave, two stars in Big Boo's Mansion, two more ate the pyramid level... Everything really relied on the secret stars. Getting upstairs was the biggest challenge. The levels were almost mere impossible.

I have anothe fond memmory being home with Grandma Welsh. Mom and Dad had to drive Grandma Donut back home to Massachuttes. This would take about a day. The other grandma was babysitting me. I remember getting into her white car, driving to the beer store, buying a Budwiser 6 pack, and then, I would be playing Super Mario, at Wet Wet World, while she was drinking awhile watching. I just discovered how to get underground the water fortress. It was impossible. Mario has to do a trick jump on a raft to reach a far highted platform where a pink bomb-om is. She would open the cannon nessecary to go in the underwater fortress. Mom called the house, Grandma answered, but prefered me to talk into it. Mom asked, "are you ok? is everything fine?" I just said yes to everything. I didn't care about trivial things. It's a habit of mom to ask repetivie nonsense. Like it's a mental disorder. 

I remember the annoying kid up the street, Johnny, telling me that "Yoshi is in the game if you get all 120 stars." I didn't belive him. I would never get far in the game. Not until later, till I was 13. 70 stars is enought to visit Bowser, kill him, and rescue Peach. The game ends with an infinite "Thank you for playing screen." Getting 120 stars and visitng Yoshi is an extra. The reward is 99 lifes. Meaningless. Since Life was spent obtaining 120 stars. The game is a big children's playroom. That is the ultimate meaning behind Super Mario 64.

I remember in High School, in 10th grade, my best friend Eric was intrested in Super Mario 64. He never played it. I let him borrow for a month. I found no purpose in video games at that point. Eric was able to obtain 120 stars in about 4 weeks. I was driving him to my house. I told him “Well once you get 120 stars you get to meet Yoshi on top of the tower." "What?” he replied back. He didn't know such a thing existed. Eric has asperbers. It was his goal to obtain 120 years before he ever fought Bowser at 70 stars. Unfrotuenlty, the game is meaningless without 120. The game really ends at 70. Everythin is unlocked. It is even possble to glitch jump at the top of the tower to meet Yoshi sooner. The game is a big treasure hunt for stars.

I think it was about a year ago, in 2015, that I tried Super Mario 64 again. This time, I wanted to be a supreme master at the game. I wanted to read the novel text to text. I wanted to remeber every single line and piece of information the game had to offer. In doing so, the journey ended up becoming two speedrun sessions to 70 stars and beating bowser. The first time it took me about 2 and a half hours. I started at 5PM, and ended at 7:43PM. The next day or so, I tried another speedrun, and got 2 hours. It was at 6PM, ended at 8:06PM. My average therfor is about 2 hours. Wow. With enough mastery, the game can be accomplished in two hours. Two hours! If the game file had a time, the time commited as a child till teenager would of been something like 50+ hours.

I have now mastered Super Mario 64 and know the maze. The treasure hunt for stars is fun. There has been no other game like it. Super Mario Sunshine tried to emulated it. It was more advance are based around grahpics. Too hard. Super Mario 64 was the first of it's kind. Low-tech. An embrassing windows 95 game. Something caught in the 90's zeitgist.

I have learn to reapperaite the game with Depehce Mode. Two albums I listen to, Songs of Faith and Devotion (1993) and Ultra (1997). Imagine, some young teenager out there must have either the two albums, and in 1996, played Super Mario 64 for the first time. The sound of both those albums are lost in thought. When I hear "Rush" I think of Wet Wet World or longjumping in the pirate cove. As with "It's No Good" or "Useless," jumping into those painting worlds, or being lost in a desert. There is a charm to 90's Depehce Mode. The music and the culture. Wraped up around Super Mario 64. New games can't be old. They have standards to fit in with the current trends. I can see, maybe in the future, hip vide-game designgers finding old computers, and remaking Super Mario 64 clones. There would be a whole genre for it. A nostalgic genre. Problem is, it's never comign back. Art is apperiated for it's ordinary self. The ironic is shamed.

What do I do when I'm bored? I go back and play Super Mario 64. Even though I beated, it has grown on to me. Like Bridge or Electronic Simon. A silly children's game that won't go away. It's an advance one too. The retirment center with old people will cry over the memories they had with Super Mrio 64 and Nintendo 64.

A strange life experince...


Thursday, May 26, 2016



It's hard to imagine the history of European people. The most significant turn for our people, was in the year 1789. This was the start of The French Revoultion. Soon after, which follows is variant periods. The Romantic period, The Victorian period, Modernist period, Postmodernist period, and now, something of a Post-Postmoderism is happening. It's been 200 years. As a people, we are at civil war with one another. The problem with us keeps getting worse as technolgoy keeps getting better. One sense of the ordinary is improved, then discarded for another "ordinary." Whatever happen to our natural lifves? As peasants? As hunters? As animals? Not as intellectual beings. We are now referees to a game we don't want to play. Every possible thought comes across our thought, and we embrace it. Life now is our own responsbility, so everyone can be like us.

The Left-Wing / Right-wing dictomny is the most important concept in our lifes. As a race and as a culture. It is a game we made up. The Frecnh Reveultion did open up Pandora's Box. It all start we the overthrow of the king. Two separate parties we made. Those for the people's interest were on the left, and those who wanted to retain order were on the right. The French language is complicated. Cultrually, it was the "left" that disguised itself from "us" and "them." The Right never embraced itself. The Ultra-loyalist went along with it, as it was a safe code. Once you give in and play their game, you surrender. That what has slowly happened to the so-called "right." or, shuld it be called, "ordinary life."

There is no balanced system. The left and right is not a blanced. It is not ying or yang. First came the interest of the "left," and then that school of thought argued against the "right" (ordinary life) as the enemy, and the left the good guys. The rigt only embraces itself to fight against the left.

Everything after has been a word game. Words like "racist," "sexist" "cisgender" "political-correctness," is all but talk of the left. The left rules our consciousness spirtually and cultrally as a people. If explained to an ordinary person, you would be outed as a conspircy theroist. "the left," translate to a group of people, like "the jews." The left is so natatural, it is like breathing. One cannot think about breathing. Breathing is just is.

An Axiom: "The left," is nothing more than an emotion as European people. "The left" is our passions, emotions, and dreams, coming into reality. "The left," is the desires and manifestations of white people. "The right," was made up my "the left," to belittle ordinary life. Those who are on the far- right were once on the far-right. To be a Neo-Nazi is to go against the whole histroical narrative as a people. The far-right is only countering the dogmas of the left. They are the reactionary party. A world where The French Revoultion has been an ultiamte disease for European people.

What is the difference between the two? The Left, is about the mind. Everything takes place in the mind. the left belives that the mind can become a reality. Whatever one thinks, can become tht form. It is a sense of freedom of the imagination. Freedom from "opression.” The left belives in egalatarism. If one cane think, one can be do the ssame. Equality is strived as the most important issues is because the left want's everyone to be happy. The left want's everyone to have the same power as the free person has. There is no system of opression or rules of law. The left seeks to make European man free from nature. Everythin is there for him to eat.

The left also belives in hedonism. Life, to the left, is about achieving satisfication. The greater good wants nothing but ice cream. The left imagines a world where every feeling can be achieved. They want to experience constant emotions of joy and suffering. But, suffering is traded in for joy. Happiness is ultimae for the left. The left would like life to become a happy narrative, full of confidence, sex, food, and adventure. Everyone can attain their own social narrative. There is no conflict, because everyone is happy. The left wants freedom from nature and enternal hedonism.

The right, however, defined by the left, are the exact opposite. Natrually, the so-called "right" is the ordinary life. Ordinary life knows that there are limits as human beings. We are born, we live, and we die. There is nothing of materalistic achivement. Life is about procreation, survival, and the enjoyment of "being." (Martin Heideggar). We are animals. Our body chemistry is hardwired to do natural things agiasnt out own will. We are hungry, we are horny, we have to shit. The left is ultimatley appaled at this reality.

Furthermore, the right is in-egalatarian by nature. The ordinary life embraces hierachy, natural order, the weak and the strong, the survival of the fitess. There is no higher langauge or intellgensia. Concepts like "reasoning" "logic" "a thesis" is langauge by bourgeois European man. None of this talk is use to surive in the jungle. Animals kill one another. It's not good or evil. It's the way life is. In-egalatarism is the most important vaule of ordinary life. Ordinary life is naive and ignorant of this concept. That's how powerful natrual life is. The left wants to reform all of this. The left is the "enlightened" and the right are made up of "barbarians." It is the job for any liberal, to educate a group of barbarians and reform their lifes into an intellect, or become enlightened. (indoctrination).

Contrast to the left, the right is all about survial than of hedonism. Enjoyment is from living an ordinary life, not the pursuit of materalistic, advance, concepts of "pihlosphy." It is the reason, why all major relgions, outside Christianity and Judaism, is a form of the "right." To talk to a liberal, to say Buddahsim is apart of the "right," is as well appalling.
the liberal seeks to enlighten everyone from "bad" to good. To become a PhD, to study other subjects, and to label things as "right" or "left" is the langauge of our people. We are ultimatley playing the game of the left, and of The French Revoeultion. It's why, they will on one second, protest for "free-speech," and then protest agaisnt "hate-speech." They like to say, "Free speech is not hate speech." It is because, "free speech" is nothing more than liberal speech. Frechn Revoultion rehtroic. Or, leftist rehtroic (controversly).

Is it possible, for somone on the so-called right, or reactionay position agiant the French Revoultion, to go beyound this way of thinking? It;'s like, we as European our stuck in our own ways of thinking. A dog must see other animals as dogs. We as white people see the world also as pan- European people. It is the most hardest philosphy conundrum to get over. We are sinful because we ate from the tree of God. If only we lived a natural life... Just like Africans, Chinese, Japanese, Indians, and everyone else. Our intellect is our burden. Yet, it gives up the powerful to become artist. No one else on this planet made the internet, cars, spaceships, medicine, books... we made it up! This is what we should take pride in. We do, but keep it a secret. We would rather use the langauge of the left we have made up. European people like to feel good from being "above-it-all." We feel good when we feel like intellects or doing something morally good (something out of Christianity). This is a problem. Our own emotions advocate our own demise. Mass civilization and globlasim is not helping. The future will become a further discussion of thinking about the left and it's consequences.

Is it ever possible to reach nirvanna with our thoughts? Our, is it the dooming infulence of the left? The left wants to reform everyone into utopia. The right is just is. The left wants to pick on everyone who dosen't fit their agenda. It is all about reforming. Our greatest problems have been about communism and ideology. A leftist treats other subjects as barbarians. A constant struggle to win trust with other leftist how pure they really are.

It's why there is no safe ground with leftist. They hate themeselfes equally how the hate ordinary life. They want a revoultion against nature.




Monday, May 23, 2016



Tiger Lily. Tim Biskup's daugther, yes?

Trying to listen to Exciter again. Red headed step child of an album. What is there to love? Dream on?

Most controversial Depeche Mode single of all time. The single that dosen't sound like Depeche Mode. I like the guitar. The glitch drums are intresting. Acoustic rock is not powerful enough. Compare it to "I Feel You" (1993) and "Barrel of a Gun." (1997) Dream On fails with it's vigor. It sounds like an intro to a long and boring anime. Gungrave? Some fantasy anime? Not sure. I think some Japanese like Depeche Mode in 2001. The Exciter sound is so bland. A ripoff of indietronic Radiohead stuff. Not DM. I guess that’s when they went to Playing the Angel. I have never heard Dream On played live after 2005. Funny.

What else is there? I like Shine. Shine is like a bastard variant of The Love Thiefs. Intresting intro. Nice hook. Calm song about reflection. The Machinedrum hits are catchy. And the "hoo-hoos." Kind of embarrassing with the "learning to fly" and "mystery ride” line. It’s in the song without a good purpose. However, the chorus is great. I hear DM in that. It feels like Shine could of been so much better if the producer was not Mark Bell. LFO is great band. But Bell can't hold the responsibilities for DM. 1999-2000 was just a bad year to make music. Sometimes I wished DM would quit at that point. That would also mean no Playing The Angel, Sounds of the Univerese, or Delta Machine. It’s just a period without Alan Wilder.

"The Sweetest Condition", "I Feel Loved" and "Freelove" sound very similar to "The Sweetest Perfection", "I Feel You" and “Strangelove." Concidence? Or regurgitate material? This might be another reason why the album was hated. I personally dislike I Feel Loved. I like the Danny Tenaglia mix though. That reminds me of Super Monkey Ball. The original is god-awful. DM looking to be hip and EDM-like. The Sweetest Condition reminds me of being lazy. A nice sound, not big enough. It feels like any other song on the album. Freelove is a good song the first time to give it a listen. The album version is too redundant. I prefer the Flood mix... Nice and danceable. Freelove, the album-cut, needs no guitar. It would sound so much out there.

Well, that's going on too much. The album is already retarded. The biggest problem of the album is the tracklist. I think I would appreciate the album much more if it was shorter. The mix style is odd. Why The Sweetest Condition to When the Body Speaks? Or Body Speaks to The Dead of Night? So ugly! There was no plan to track this album at all. A good thing about When The Body Speaks, it reminds me of Super Mario 64. Off topic.

Comotose is the best song on the album, a Martin Gore song. It's fantastic. This is only thing the experimental style did produce. It feels best suited for Gore. Exciter songs are either scattered drum machines or FX synths. No assemble at all. Bad minimal techno. An anti-Ultra sound.

I love Breathe too. Another Gore lazy track. That was the whole album, being lazy. The plan was to act like Radiohead. Intresting. Just not like DM. Was that the result of grunge rock? Indietronic? DM therefor jumps from grude rock into indietronic? No way.

I love “I Am You.” Massive Attack feel. Some energy I can feel. 

"Goodnight Lovers" is a bizarre single. Nothing is going on. Almost listening to nothing. The lost theme song to Reading Rainbow?

The Dead of Night would of been a better single. That song dosen't deserve to be on Exciter. The only "rock" song on the album. Goodnight Lovers is only known for that sprakle synth, and the humiliating push to get black people to like DM (see video). That's about it.

Another complaint: The album can be fitted onto single slab of vinyl. The 2X really ruins the album.

I can't say much more. Just getting through 20 mins of the album I have to turn it off. And this is right before bed!



Saturday, May 21, 2016



I am trying to remember when I first came across Patalliro. It might of been when I was 21. I was learning Japanese. I often surfed YouTube Japan for Japanese media. I would favorite certain media I would find cultrually alienating. At the time, I really loved Aim for the Ace! I saw the animated movie when I was 20. The 1970's animated series is wonderful too. Still one of my favorite animes. I think I was really into Tatsunoko Productions at the time. I was searching openings and endings to old animes. (I get in my own world).

I am always looking for the next big thing... I came across the ending for Patalliro. The sad song with Mariarch and Bacoran. I thought she was a girl at first. I like the whole "goth" aesthetic to the ending. Orange and black have such a contrasting color. I had to find more of this stylish anime. Turns out, after doing a copy and past with the title, I found the first episode. Japanese only.

The opening title was misleading. It was about a boy. Who are the two ending figures? I did some research somewhere, through Wikipedia and Google, and found the first episode in english subtitles. It was confusing at first. A boy that did goofy things. I could not believe this was the premise of the show and not the vampire man and orange hair princess. Watching futher, the first episode was called "Bishonen Killer." This would lead more to the male characther. As I watched the first episode, many confusing concepts rose about. The first girl introduce, Jada, is actully a guy! Played by a voice actress! In this future, guys cross-dress as girls. Jack Bacoran, the bishonen killer, can seduce any underage boy he wants. Patalliro, the goofy prince, is attracted to Bacaoran! Already, there is acertain pedophile theme to the whole anime. I'm not sure how to make up of everything. And then, Patalliro's henchmen, the Tagami (gralic people). Supposedly a group of handsome young men, enslaved by Patalliro, and mouth and eyes and hair covered, to hid thier beuaty. And that red thing that comes up with Patalliro is smacked, when he does certain things. It hides in the paintings and is Patalliro's consciousness. And finally, Supercat! The greatest indoor joke of it all. A flying cat that come across the sky and out of nowhere. It is a joke spoted by the audeince. This is a meta breaking concept. All in the first episode these things can be seen. The episode ends with a cliffhanger. On to the next I suppose. I think I became hooked after that.

I think the main attraction to keep on watching was also the background and setting. The art direction is superb. I noticed the gothic style buildings and the old victorian skylines. When the characthers look, they are Egyptianwall paintings, and up front, 3D. Also, just watching the Stardust Project movie, references to David Bowie and Kiss is made. This is apart of the 1970's. A prelude to Arena Rock and Prince. Patalliro is full of Japanese- exculsive comedy. English viewing has a hard time understanding the humor. Japanese celebrities I have never heard of. This similar in the style of Kuragehime. An anime about a group of homeless and socially akward girls. Humor is relied on Japanese pop-culture. Pop-culture is not universal. In the end, Westerns find it more intresting to study than finding it funny. Patalliro has the strange goofy humor with constant puns. Afterwords, it switchs back to gay, romantic love scenes. And the confusing plot with the diamond synidcate and demons. There is something lost in translation.

At that time, 14 episodes have been fan ttranslated. There are notw 17 english sub epsidoes. For what I researched, there is 50-60 more episodes needing a translation. Why has the West never picked this up? From my own research, Patalliro has had it's own Enlgish fan-fictions in 1980's and 90's American anime zeens. Amazing. This was known when some anime was being translated after the Akira boom. And, an artist by the name of Colleen, author of the Stan Lee biogrpahy, saw anime in the lens of Patalliro. Jaw- dropping. This is where I became obsess with the creation. The writer and aritsit is Mineo Maya. Also I have found out he was a cross-dresser, a balarina and onnegata. He is married with three daughters, and his youngest son looks like Patalliro. His art is infulenced from Audrey Bearsly, Harry Clarke, Gustave Flint, and traiditonal Japanese shojo, like Rose of Versallies. Patalliro is full of controversy, that the only dedicated audience it has been targeted for is girls. Patalliro is found under the "hana to yume" label. An all girls romance label. Intresting. Even the anime was targeted for both young boys and girls. We would consider on the lines of an "adult" genre.

When I was in New York City, May 3rd 2016, I had a sweat once I came across new issues of Patalliro. I bought them all for the store for $50. Vols 82- 92. I used my Japanese to find it and it worked. I plan on going back to that Japanese book store again. The Inoue Vegabond memorial made me cry. I couldn't sehad a tear, but I felt overwhelmed. This was heaven. I was in Japan.

The volumes are sitting on my brown table. I open them and try to read the Japanese. New characthers introduced. Maya has changed to a digital style. Old Patalliro is hand drawned. I would like to find a Japanese anthology of classic Patalliro. Maya's art amazes me. In addition to the new Patalliro mangas I bought, I also have a Mineo Maya commentary book. It is about his love for Salador Dali. At the end, he has a Patalliro comic featuring Dali meeting him. Strange. I wish to translate the book too. I had $200, I would like to buy the $200 Mineo Maya Tarot cards. So esoteric. That is something I would play tarot with. Also, I have a famicom game called Elysium. The art, and front over, was done by Mineo Maya. Strange baby-like creatures fighting a skeleton and some sword pertruding out. I must collect's Maya's art whereever it appears. His art fascinates me.

I have since signed up with ArinFantasy Yaoi forum and have contacted the original translator of Patalliro. His name is Emreyl. A gay cross-dresser who majored in Japanese in 2008. He currently lives in California. I suggest the series to be fully translated. My infulence might work. They are considered starting a funding campaign. These fringe nerds have an interest in Maya what fascinates me too.

The story in Patalliro is one of the most shocking things to explain. I'm not sure If I fully understand it either. It's hard to even tell it to a normal person. So much is going on. Every concept is amoral. I found the ultimate art form. Patalliro is truly a Japanese experince. I have never read something more fascianting than Yukio Mishima. This manga has to be studied.



Friday, May 20, 2016

Songs of Faith and Devotion


I remember coming across Songs of Faith and Devotion online. It was on Myspace music I first listen to "I feel you." I knew right away the song had guitars in it. It was definally a rock n roll song. I read somewhere before, in an interview with Gary Numan, what album did he prefer, Violator or Songs? Numan liked both albums and dised those who prefered analog over digital. This sound like a confusing conversation. He was also refering to both Depeche Mode albums. At that time, I only knew Violator. I loved Violtor. I remember being 19 and listeing to Violator on the New Jersey beach.. It was such a beautiful album, I cried. It had such a powerful infulence over me. Somethings were turbulent in my life back then. I cherished Violator as a close album of mine. It was until last year, late 2015, did I listen to Songs. I was amazed again!

I remember going on Youtube and just listening through the album all the way through while trying to do homework. "I Feel You," felt like a scene from Banjo-Tootie. I guess I was watching longplays of the game. Trying to be nostalgic again. The album had a strange feel to it. I was feeling something of Violator again. An emotion I can't describe. I think I heard "Walking in my Shoes" did I have to stop the album and do something else. Returing back to album, somehow, Walking in my shoes catched on. It is the most meloncolny song I have ever heard. It's like I heard it on the radio before. I have a vision of somekind of bad family animated film in mid 90's. I think it was, "Princess and the Swan," "The Quest for Camelot," "Fern Gully," really bad and forgotten movies only kids in the 90's would remember. It was like being a bottom feeding cat-fish. This is the kind of movies you have to watch if you can't watch the main Disney movies.

Somehow, Walking in my shows leaves that impression on me. A song in a trailer for a bad animated film. I don't think about this all the time, but it was the first taste, smell, sight when I heard Walking. I since saw the video, and loved it even more. The esoteric imagery, the occulist birds, the ugly people, the dark tower behind Gahan. Such a sad song. It has to ressonant with me too. The pain I have to spend my money and go to get a fraud degree. Youth wasted. Try walking in my shoes...

"Condenation" is very catchy. A song about refelection. Reminds me of The Wind Rises. I saw that movie three times in 2014. Something about Condemnation is memorable. An industrial ballet? A song about forgiveness? It's a gutteral song. It comes from the soul. I noticed right away Gahan is the singer. Something I never heard before. Originally, Gore was suppose to sing the song. But Gahan butted. It is really a song about him. I have other feelings too. Like I'm a space marine, walking down a long dark corridor to amny fatal fate. A slow song heading for the hills. A good song.

"Mercy In You" is a classic. I always sing this song while I'm driving. I'm not so sure why the song was not called "The Mercy In You." I guess it sounds cooler. Don't know why it wasn't a single either. Condenmation is a good song, I just don't think it should be a single. I always see Captain Syrup from Wario Land with this song. Scene from Wario Shake It! too. Strange. An action-esque song. I have to do something. I absoulety love the bridge to the chorus. The song feels like a clash between so many things. Gore was going for a pop single. Gahan wanted a blues songs. Guitars were added in because of an arguemment. The Mercy In You is quinesstinal Depehce Mode. The backwards synth is so memorable and the chanting. Chanting has alot to do with this album. In fact, everything on this album is a song. A song about faith and devotion. The Blues infulence lurks in.

I didn't know what to make of Judas at first. Such a sad song. The first ballet. track 5. I know why the song is hear. It's the last track on side A. It's a perfect ending for one side of 20 mins of music. Ironically, It was the last song recorded for the album. Daniel Miller, producer, argued making songs on this album was touture. It was a hellish experince. Nobody ever wanted to back to the Spain studio to make another album. It was the end of Depeche Mode. Something about the members were heated against each other. In a way, this would be the ture and original final song on the album. Gore ahas such a beautiful song. Every DM album has at least two Gore tracks. I wish to hear more. It's a shame his voice is not used more often. Judas is a rewinding song about devotion. Judas, the kiss of death onto Jesus. If you want my love. He says. Such instrumental in the last mintue of the song. A hypnotic daze begins. The wind is always so powerful. Judas became a faovirte of mine later, not instantly. I love it.

"In Your Room" has the best emotion on the album. It's hard to explain the song in words. The first buzzing synth is well-known. The rest afterwards is hard to explain. But the voice, "In Your Room... Time stand stills." Gahan has a blasting voice. A perfect blend of wind and synth FX. It's the part, where the strong sytnh hit comes in. Some new state of consiousness happens. I went back thinking of Super Mario 64, Wet Wet World. The drums come in.
So powerful. I never shed a tear on this song, but it has the power to do so. In Your Room is meant to be experinced, not listen to. The 5th time I listen to the song, my emotion dissapered. I lost the impacted I originally felt. It was like some kind of epic ending to a video game I never played. The secret ending to Super Mario 64. The original song to played during credits. I can imagine, zooming in first person with Mario, looking at random objects. As a third person camera looks at the entire map. Objects dancing. All the goombas, the koopas, some weird manniquin dancings. All ahrd to explain. It is one of the best songs on the album. If you never heard this song before, go take a listen in a very dark room.

"Get Right With Me," is intresting. It's another variant of Condemnation. Gahan and Soulsavers "Shine" is very similar to this sound. Nice use of turntable scraching. Never will hear it again in a DM song. Very Trip-Hop oriented. A song about reflection. I like it a lot. I feel like Crash Bandicoot when ever I hear it played. Kind of like a virtual segull flying across. I can see it. Maybe in a desert. Driving in a car too. I can see the sand dunes and the gassy horizon. When the sun sets, the skys goes back and forth. I think I like the guitar alot. The rift after the chrous is good. It is rather a good relxing song. I should do nothing but hang in the sun and listen to this song. A rock song. They should of, stopped the song after the break and into the bizarre interlude. Intresting part. If it was a music video, strange things would happen. I like the interlude alot. Amazing use of noise and feeling.

I love "Rush." I am always listening to it. It never gets old! In Your Room loses it's emotion after sometimes. Rush never gets old. Why was this never a single? It is the only synth-rock song ever by DM. It's so strange to listen to "Just Can't get Enought" and then Rush. Rush is so powerful. I love the synth. That is the best part. "Bada-bump Bump-bump-bump, Bump-bump" repeat. And the break down. the reggae drum going off. Gahan on the floor. Loose like a maniac. So much emotional. That errier guitar too. It's like a Palacebo guitar. Very grundge or emo noise. Darkwave. Very much apart of the 90's. I never heard it ever replicated ever again. It's a special kind of guitar. And finally, the best part, the last part of the song. The mosh guitar. It reminds me of Final Fantasy. FF OVA from the 90's. Some really dead serious evill sinister thing going on. I just want to dance to that loop over and over again. Too bad the songs jsut ends with it. Such emotion Rush has.

"One Careless" is special. The second Gore song. The use of a classical orchestra is great. The only unique DM song that does this. So much emotional. Once again, the bad animated movies come about. Maybe, "Anatasia," "Hunchback of Notre Dame," some kind of broadway animated film. 1993 is a strange year indeed. One Caress is powerful. I love Gore. I sing this song a lot. I just can never get down the long parts. I like to think about every teenage girl that listen to this song. How many of them fell in love with Gore? What did it mean to them? Something about the "bless" part gets me. Ballroom dancing. Some of the best emotion.

"Higher Love" is controversial. A strange ending song to choose. It's long. Cool synth FX. But really can't say more. I love when Gahan is in pain when he sings. He really shows it in this song. "Quest for Camelot" with that stupid blue two-headed dragon appears in my mind. I have no idea. 1993? The chorus is catchy. Just not friendly. I think the bridge and the intro really stands out more. The song is however, a great opener, along with Rush. Seeing DM live, with Higher Love leaves a powerful emotion. It's like Higher Love, was suppose to be a single. Not a good single I will say. Some blues chorus is in it. I like it. It is an intresting alternative to Clean. Clean however is much more eviler. Higher Love has an angel sound to it. No matter, Higher Love does end the album perfectly. Slow, slow, slow, until nothing. The repeative synth loops are great. I just imagine what it like to record this song with Depeche Mode in the studio. Was it hard? Was it impossible? What was the original purpose of the song? Was it suppose to be better and because of deadlines, they ended making it a happy song? What if Gore took over it and made it a dance single? It's hard to imagine if this song had more of a Violator feel to it.

I always like to think Songs as a spirtual sequal to Violator. That what it always is. What sounds on the album are similar? Is 1989 and 1993 that differnt in sound? Songs improved Violator so much. I have been sining the album since August of 2015. Now May 2016, It's has difined my last year at college. The hard times I went through, I listend to Songs. Amazing. Will leave a bookmark on the part of my life.


Thursday, May 19, 2016

Ok This Is The Second Post.

Going to Try this out.


what the fuck are you talking about you silly fucking fagget" k said to j

im talking about heideggerian ecofascism you fkn shitdick' said j

i just dont get it. sorry man i just dont get your gat fucking nazi shit'

you wouldnt understand you fkn pussy, i hate you and your gay politics. you have a repressed sense of your own creature' said j

'see man here you go again, why dont your take that shit and shove it up your ass' said k

"no man, just no. i wont stand back and consume your shitty ideology, you are just a materialistic and inauthentic slave, you dont even know why you are alive' said j

'no dude, youre just a fucking fagget who doesnt get any pussy and just talks about pretentious german poetry shit"

its philosophy"
whatever man, suck a dick" k said with an apahtetic demeanor

"if you want to have a good life then you have to ask these wierd questions about your own life and not feel like you are being contstricted by the normative ideas of society man" said j

man fuck society" the words came out of k's lips like cotton and molaasses.

the world continued to turn and the universe didnt care about the two monkey creatures extolling the values of their modern lives. if anything, the universe thought, he hoped both of the creatures would soon vanish before they grew strong enough to plague the vast void with their commotion. the universe was happiest when their was nothing init. the universe was happen when things died and returned to dust.

tired angry dialogue with myself, invoking the spirit of a troll.